If you’ve ever been caught by the snitch bitch known as the speed camera, then get down on your knees and worship at the vigilante feet of your new God.
DC Metropolitan Police have released footage from last Tuesday night of a hooded rebel who had enough of the speed camera’s snitching ass ways and decided to destroy the trick. When a car pulled up close to a speed cam in the 1500 block of Kenilworth Avenue NE, the hooded hero pounced out and ran toward that bitch with the anger of someone who just got a $500 speeding ticket in the mail. He took that speed cam down, but he’s no amateur, so he didn’t stop there. He knew that the speed camera ain’t shit without its snitching eye (aka its camera), so he pulled it out and tried to break it before tossing it across the street. This shit is like a scene out of the 2018 reboot of Falling Down, and yes, I screamed, “WHOOP THAT TRICK,” while watching this.
The police say that at least four cameras were destroyed in that area on Tuesday night, so the speed cam-killing avenger was busy. Destroying police property is a crime, of course, so they’re looking for the suspect.
Speed cameras in DC brought the city around $99 million in tickets in 2016 alone.
I feel that dude’s pain and anger. Getting caught speeding through a speed camera is cheating! At least with a human police officer, you can try to get out of getting a speeding ticket by crying about how your dog is lying on their death bed and you’re trying to get to the animal hospital before it’s too late, or by saying, “Officer, I’m sure there’s some way we can work this out,” while making the blowjob symbol with your mouth (which will probably end with you in a jail cell, but at least you tried).
And it’d be a real bitch if that speed cam recorded a clear shot of the hooded hero before he killed it. If there’s a robot heaven, that speed camera will be up there smugly cackling over getting the last laugh.